So what's crackalacking? Not a whole lot really. I've pretty much came to terms with my destiny of being a sorry mofo. It will be weird as shit not having anything to do. I know most people, including myself, have dreamed of being able to not do a damn thing all day. However, I don't know that I am actually looking forward to it that much. I kind of feel like the old guy that's about to retire and then starts thinking about all of the things he wants to do. The only difference is that I won't have any money to do any cool shit with.
Other than becoming the best Guitar Hero the world has ever known I don't have much on my agenda. One big goal is going to be to lose some weight and get in tip top shape. I'm not a fatass per say, but I could use to lose some poundage in the guttox and build some muscle. So, hopefully I'll make good use of my idle time by working out. One of my goals for a while now has been to be in the best shape I have been in a long time before I turn 30. T-minus 99 days for that. I may go as gay as to post weekly pictures of my fatass gut to see if there are any noticeable changes are taking place. Plus that added pressure should help me to stick with it and actually get into shape. That will be a different blog to spare you non-homos of having to see me slowly evolve into a beast of a man Possibly something along the lines of www.unfatdAndy.blogspot.com or www.dAndybeshapinup.blogspot.com or maybe even www.thisfatfuckthinkshecangetintoshape.blogspot.com. I'll think up something good once I get all this time on my hands or if you have any ideas throw a comment up in this mug! Just think, your creative insight could lead to a blog name. You'll be famous and rich and have a yacht and shit.
Of course I'll probably blog my ass off while taking breaks from ripping out killer streaks on the Guitar Hero Would Tour expert level. So you have that to look forward to as well. I'll probably fire www.dAndymancandy.blogspot.com back up again for sports/fantasy bullshit. Might get a little Jaguar or UF feature kicking. Hell I'll probably get so bored that I will blog about shit that's on C-SPAN and what not. I can see it now..."BREAKING FUCKING NEWS - THE HOUSE JUST VOTED YES ON BILL #4208457." That will be on www.dAndytalkspoliticsnshit.blogspot.com.
One idea that hit me recently was to create a website for the wealthy to donate money to me. I know it sounds a little far fetched at first glance, but just relax and go with me to my happy place for a bit. How many rich fuckers do you think would miss $10, $20, or even $50 a month? The numbers on that are probably mind blowing if you think about it even with the economy the way it is. If I could make my own charity then they could even write the donation off right? Don't rich fuckers love to feel good about helping people and then harness that warm and fuzzy good feeling all the while getting a tax write off out of it? The answer to that is FUCK and YES! All I need to do is figure out a creative marketing strategy and get the word spread. If I could get a handful of people to buy into helping a good guy who is faced with the challenges of living life making less than 25% of what he was making before going on unemployment while trying to afford a place to live and support 2 kids with no decent future job in sight. How cool would that be if I could make it fly? I guess the first step would be creating a site to get donations from rich people to help a guy get a charity started to create a site for rich people to donate money to. But then I would need to create a site to get donations to create the site to get donations to create the site. It's a viscous cycle, but I've got time.
One thing my soon to be ex-boss told me that I will cherish forever was that laziness can create some of the best solutions to problems. I found that out by being the sorry mofo that I am. Basically when faced with a task or challenge my lazy ass would think of the easiest way or a way to get shit did with the least amount of physical effort which in 3 out of 6000 times would actually lead to a good way of getting something hard done. So that's some of my reasoning behind the rich people help dAndy plan. www.pleasehelppodAndy.blogspot.com will be the place for that to take place. Wish me luck in my endeavors!
Stay tuned I'll get better about posting soon. Especially in a couple few weeks! In the meantime here is a picture of what I will be doing when that day comes......
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1 comment:
Good luck on the T-minus 99 days. That's not a whole lotta time to get in "tip top shape"!! I think you would have better luck with getting money from rich people by robbing their houses and pawning the stuff. However, now we are talking about committing a crime. So, probably not the best idea... hmm, i'll keep thinking...
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